LUST- OVERCOMING THE TEMPTATION.

Overcoming Porn, picture fantasy, and just plain LUST.

This blog is for the mature reader not intended for children. Every day, television, movies, billboards, newspapers and magazines bombard us with lustful images. And when lustful thoughts become part of our lifestyle, we feel like prisoners to those controlling desires. But God does not want us to suffer in the prison of lust. He offers hope and freedom when we turn to Him for help to understand the truth behind the lies of lust.

The Roots Of Lust

Lust has been with mankind throughout history. In fact, at the creation of the world, God met Adam and Eve's basic needs for food, companionship and protection. Yet He put one thing out of their reach to test their love for Him - the tree of the knowledge of good and evil (Gen. 2:16-17).

Due to lust, they failed God's test! Satan tempted Eve by telling her that God was holding back something good. She and Adam, through lust, ate the forbidden fruit. As a result, they subjected all mankind to God's curse (Gen. 3:6, 16-19).

A Thirst For More

The roots of lust run so deep that it is almost instinctive. And once we begin to fulfill our own lusts, a vicious cycle begins. Lust leads to sin. Sin breaks our relationship with God (Romans 1:24-32). We become numb to lust's impact, so we think we can lust even more.

That is the very nature of lust: an unquenchable thirst for more and more ... . More money, fame, power, revenge, food, clothing, love. Unless our desires are turned over to the Lord, we will never be satisfied.

Quenching The Thirst

If you have been searching in vain for fulfillment through the things of this world, then now is the time to discover the answer to the greatest desire in your life.

The Bible says that our greatest need is to worship God. This is why we created (Col. 1:16). But sin has separated us from God (Romans 3:23) and only through Jesus can we be forgiven of our sins and restored to God.

Jesus said, "I am the way, and the truth, and the life! ... Without me, no one can go to the Father" (John 14:6). If you have never given your life to Jesus - and made Him Lord of your deepest desires - then do so now. Simply pray and ask Jesus to come into your life by the power of the Holy Spirit (Romans 10:9,10).

The Daily Battle

Due to our fallen nature, we will have to deal with lust until we die. The temptation to lust will come in many forms. There are external lusts, including ungodly sexual appetites and overindulgence in food and drink; and there are internal lusts, such as the lust of power, fame or position.

Therefore, we must rely on the power of the Holy Spirit inside us to overcome lust every day. "Let the Lord Jesus Christ be as near to you as the clothes you wear. Then you won't try to satisfy your selfish desires" (Romans 13:14)

No matter the form of lust we face, we can be assured that we have an Advocate who "understands every weakness of ours" and "was tempted in every way that we are. But He did not sin" (Heb. 4:15). Jesus is not a distant God who is looking to judge you, He is your friend, and he has walked the road you are walking right now!

Victory Over Lust

God does not want you to be a prisoner of lust. The Bible says, "Christ has set us free! (Gal. 5:1). We have assurance from our Lord that he will help us to battle lust (Romans 8:31-32). Try these practical steps and ask God to lead you to victory.

Ask God for help. Sometimes we are too ashamed to take this first step. Don't try to fight the battle of lust on your own. Go to God and ask Him for help. This is what humility is all about.

Die to lust. The Bible says "sin does not have power over dead people" (Romans 6:7). So to overcome lust, we must recognize that "the persons we use to be were nailed to the cross with Jesus" (Romans 6:5). Of course, we are not actually nailed to the cross. We just recognize that our old way of life died with Jesus. When we understand what it means to be dead to sin, we will then find freedom from lust.

Walk in the Spirit. The next step is to submit your life to the Holy Spirit. "If you are guided by the Spirit, you won't obey your selfish desires" (Gal. 5:16). Remember, you can't fight lust on your own, so ask the Holy Spirit to help you.

Renew your mind. Focus on God's Word and allow Him to remove your lustful thoughts and actions (Rom. 12:2). put away everything that appeals to the flesh and focus on God (Eph. 4:17-24; 2 Cor. 10:5).

Resist and flee. Perhaps the best advice all is simply this: Run! Don't allow lust to linger in your mind. Get far away from situations and influences that threaten to trap you (Prov. 5:8; James 4:7-8).

As You Pray

"Dear Heavenly Father, I can't deal with lust apart from you. Please forgive me and cleanse me from my sin. And please replace my lustful desires with Your desires for my life, so that I can glorify You in everything I do. Thank You. In Jesus' name, Amen"

God's Word On Lust

"Don't love the world or anything that belongs to the world. If you love the world, you cannot love the Father. Our foolish pride comes from this world, and so do our selfish desires and our desire to have everything see. None of this comes from the Father. The world and the desires it causes are disappearing. But if we obey God, we will live forever" (1John 2:15-17).

Porn damages the viewer. Proverbs 6:27 says: "Can a man scoop fire into his lap without his clothes being burned?" The implied answer is "No." Lusting after people with our eyes and thoughts is equivalent to committing the sin with them (Matthew 5:28). Porn trains us to practice lust and live in a fantasy world of evil thoughts. As a result, we burn with insatiable lust that drives us to seek gratification. The memories resulting from our porn activities can last a lifetime and damage our ability to enjoy sex in our marriage. Pornography also can lead us down the destructive path of perversion. Pedophilia, homosexuality, rape and abuse are just a few of the many possible activities that porn promotes.

Porn damages the viewer's family. For example, your children could be tormented by any evil spirits that are tormenting you, or they may simply get hooked on porn when they stumble across your porn stash of computer files or magazines. Your spouse could be devastated if he/she discovers you've been committing "mental adultery" through porn. He/she may have difficulty ever trusting you again when they discover your secret life. It could take years for you to re-learn how to love your spouse and eliminate the stranglehold lust has on you. You may have to relearn how to have sex in a loving way, since you have become tuned for lust through porn.

Masturbation is addictive and gives lust a foothold to control our minds. It also destroys our marriage sex life by sexually tuning us to ourselves. Masturbation teaches us nothing about loving our spouse and giving to him/her during sex. It's all about satisfying our own selfish desires. You find yourself having sex with eyes closed and quickly getting to your fulfillment without even a thought if your spouse has enjoyed it, or is left unfulfilled.

Pornography is a Pandora’s Box, full of exciting forbidden fruit but if opened it can destroy a happy marriage.The porn industry is raking the money in using every trick in the book to grab another buck. They want you to believe that it’s all perfectly normal, everyone’s doing it … except you, because your sex life is boring.What they won’t tell you is how their fake product can damage your marriage. Here are three ways pornography can seriously damage your marriage.

Desensitization

There are only so many times you can watch a businessman check into a hotel and find the chambermaid making the bed without any underwear on before it becomes old and boring.

So you sign up to a more adult site, hey it’s only the price of dinner out with the wife or a new playstation game for the kids and you work for the money so you deserve it.

You’re not into anything kinky so you slide on over to the teen virgin section … hey we all know they are much older and school uniforms don’t mean you want to have it away with kids. Right?

A month later that’s old and tired, hey check out the threesome section .. it’s perfectly normal, lot’s of people do that.

The wife swapping section looks good .. maybe your friends Jill and Ben would be up for that?

There’s sections for sadism and bestiality which you’ll never look at … although we know it’s only acting so you just have a quick look for a laugh.

This is the process of desensitization, in the same way that we watch more and more graphic horror movies, because we become less sensitive to what we are watching.

Desensitization leads to crossing moral boundaries you would never have dreamed of crossing before you happened across that first pornography website.

How can your wife compete with this? You now think these acts are perfectly normal and acceptable, not only that but you need such images to get excited .. however, your wife still lives in the real world. And in the meantime is beating her self up over her weight, her looks, her wrinkles, stretchmarks, bags under her eyes from stress and work, and low self esteem cause she has to compete with perfect airbrushed models, flat stomachs, and fake boobs, her husband brushes her off when she advances towards him and rarely touches her.

Self Serving

Most people will masturbate when they watch pornography, which really is a big deal. Masturbation, when you have a sexual partner waiting upstairs for you, is purely a self serving act. As an occasional act for relief it’s not a problem if your partner is not willing at the time, but when you start to prefer to masturbate watching pornography or getting mental images of lust in your mind instead of having sex with your wife or husband then your marriage is in trouble.

Once you start ignoring your wife or husbands sexual needs and sneaking off to your fantasy world then your ability to fulfill your own and your wife/husbands sexual needs as a couple are diminished. Eventually they will know something is wrong. Call it a hunch, but they will know.

If you are watching lesbian films or threesomes you will begin to feel that something is missing when you do have sex with your wife or husband.

Your spouse will therefore become boring and you will be driven right back to the films or internet and back to serving only yourself.

This can then manifest itself in a lessened feeling of affection for your wife or husband, a lack of closeness begins to emerge and your wife/husband begins to feel neglected and unloved.

Addiction

MORE, give me more!!

So you “innocently” enter the fantasy world of pornography late one night when browsing the net, while you’re wife or husband’s asleep.

You know it’s a fantasy world, the men and women aren’t real, they are surrounded by soft lighting, have fake boobs and have been ridden more often than the winner of the Grand National but it’s just a bit of fun.

You masturbate for a couple of minutes then switch it off, no harm done.

The problem is once we enter the fantasy world we can never be satisfied and the occasional look becomes a regular habit. It may start with a sexy co-eds profile picture on facebook or myspace which then in return leads you to their page and their pictures sparking a whole array of lustful thoughts and emotions.

You visit the sites more often at night after the wife or husband is asleep, until you find yourself waiting for them to go to bed so you can go and watch or scan through profiles and pictures of hot sexy young ladies. You erase all your history so that your spouse will have no idea what your up to.

You become less interested in your sexual relationship with your partner because you have the fantasy world waiting and it takes zero effort, there’s no coaxing or foreplay involved. You have officially become "not attracted" to your less than physically perfect spouse.

You hide your actions because you know your wife or husband would be upset, they would feel inadequate.

You download a couple of films .. just to watch if the computer breaks and hide them where your spouse won’t find them.

This is an addiction like any other and like any other addiction it can in time consume you.

There is also the issue of building an unrealistic image in your mind of what a healthy sexual relationship is about.

Scriptures For Study

James 4:1-4 -- The origins of lust

Romans 7:14-25 -- Our struggle with lust

1 Corinthians 6::9-10 -- Consequences of lust

Romans 6:12-23; James 4:5-8 -- Freedom in Christ

Positive, Negative Influences shape your life.

If you take a brief moment to look over the course of your life, you could probably identify people who have influenced you. Influences can come from a tremendously deep well of possibilities:Maybe a teacher who inspired you to explore an interest that eventually became your career. A song that you and your spouse fell in love to, maybe even danced to at your wedding. Or a Scripture verse that quietly reminded you that God does love you, he sees you where you are right now and longs for you to hear his voice.

Influence is a two-way street. There is just as much negative influence on you as positive. How often after watching a movie with a great car chase do you drive home a little faster than normal?

Story after story can be heard of how a negative environment influenced children to make poor life choices. Yet every now and then, one will emerge unscathed from that same kind of environment. No doubt someone's environment takes tremendous toll on shaping who they are, their view of life and their view of God. Yet some can overcome their environment while others succumb to it. The difference is who and what will be the predominant influence.

Proverbs 22:24-25 says, "Don't befriend angry people ... or you will learn to be like them and endanger your soul."

The simple but powerful reminder from this proverb is that we will live out what we choose to lock arms with. Circumstances may be thrust upon us, but choosing what influence us rests in our own hands.

The warning in this proverb is highlighting the importance of choosing your friends well. Who you surround yourself with on a regular basis will have a tremendous influence on what you do, where you go and ultimately who you become. Locking arms with angry people breeds anger. Locking arms with people of grace grows our understanding of grace. We each bear the role of being guardian to who and what influences us.

The difference between those who are dominated by their environments and those who overcome is the voices that they allow to be dominating influences in their lives. Diligently surround yourself with those who are seeking God and you will be encouraged to do the same.

Your Word is Your Bond

Men and women of integrity are people of their word. As their word is, so is their action.

Integrity means Honor with Respect
Proverbs 19:1 Better is the poor that walketh in his integrity, than he that is perverse in his lips, and is a fool.
God classes Integrity more valuable than the riches of this world. He classes Integrity more valuable than anything that we could ever own. Cheating, stealing, lying, breaking one's promises, withholding tithe money out of greed or spite is the world's way but not what the Lord desires a Christian to be. We are required to live a higher standard of living by holding our integrity dear to ourselves. When people of the world look at you as a Christian do they say you are no different than them or do they say they really respect you? Poverty if far better if a person has integrity and honor than all the riches that every existed throughout time. What is your life worth? Can you take any material thing with you when you die? We all need to get our priorities straight and realize that keeping our word is important to our self-respect as well as our integrity. As well as important to those around us.

One of the easiest things to do on earth is to say you'll do something, while you have no intention of doing so. You say so just to put off a present pressure not thinking what your word will portend for you in the future.

Is your yes a genuine yes? Is your no a genuine no? Do you say yes or no to foster a genuine cause or does the pit of your bowels quake, most of the time you use them, for you mean not what you say?
Pythagoras, the great Mathematician, said ' the oldest, shortest words - yes and no - are those which require the most thought. ' How very true! If they don't for you, then they should.

When you say, "I'll stand by you come rain come high water", do you mean every bit of it? Are you married? Did you promise to forsake all others? Til death do you part, stand by your mate in sickness and in health? Good and Bad? Do you suffer from bouts of vacillation once you set out to execute that which you say? These are too many questions to answer at one sitting. Nevertheless, they are enough to drive a point home. Which is exactly what I am trying to do at this moment.

We must be mature enough to become accountable for our word - we must see that we keep it when we give it. Many people pile load after load of guilt upon themselves by not keeping their word, then wonder why they have ulcers, heart problems and motley of other problems.

Our word, when given, is a source of faith to those who receive it, and determines their conduct. When the word is not kept, unbelief develops.

Sometimes people who refuse to compromise truth or principle are viewed with contempt. People who are of questionable behavior fear to associate themselves with men and women of integrity because they fear their unethical behavior will be exposed.

Surely, light and darkness cannot be accommodated in the same room. One of them has to bow and leave. Incidentally, something worth noting here is that when light enters a dark room, the darkness has to flee; but darkness cannot dare enter a room that is well lighted. It goes to show that people of integrity are a force to reckon with.

Sadly, people of integrity and unquestionable principle are becoming rarer and rarer by the day. Countless numbers of men and women who were once famed for their integrity are opting for mediocre, second-rate lives (lives that are 'easier' to live as there is less accountability). In the long run respect, honor and moral uprightness are thrown out the window. But don't lie to yourself: you can never lie to your conscience nor can you lie before God. It will always remind you the wonderful path you forsook for God and you only knows what reasons!

Your conscience (given by the holy spirit) is the most important thing you possess, secondly only to your souls salvation. Guard it! Screen it! Unclog it! For heaven's sake, keep it alive and use it!

When you give your word to someone you are also giving it unto the Lord. The Lord teaches us in the Bible that we must not go back on our promises even if we have to pay a higher price to keep them. Our promises are taken seriously and we will be held accountable for them. Changing our minds is not acceptable to the Lord! Keeping promises demonstrates our “True Inner Self.” It shows whether or not we have corruptible or incorruptible morals (fruitful seed) inside of us. Integrity, Honor, Self-respect and Honesty means everything to man and to the Lord! What kind of Christian walk does the Lord desire us to have? Is keeping one's word really important or do we have the right to alter and change it? Does the world respect people who break their promises? Or better yet, does God? Fellow Christians? A broken promise means a broken trust and relationship. Trust and respect as well as one's honor is the basis of our relationship with each other as well as our Lord. He expects us to keep our word, (vow, oath) to him and to others as well!

Remember:

o Standing for right when it's unpopular is a true test for moral character. You know... Just say NO!!!!

o Be more concerned with your character than with your reputation. Your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are. God judges you by and your loved ones rely on your character.

o Hold yourself responsible for a higher standard than anybody expects of you. Never excuse yourself. Never pity yourself. Be a hard master to yourself; be lenient to everybody else.

o Excellence is the result of habitual integrity. We are supposed to mirror ourselves in his image! What would Jesus do?